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When you adopted...

Started by Meredith , author of Cornish Adoption Journey 11/7/2010 2:08:31 AM

What kind of arrangements did you start making for your adopted child before coming home?  What did you do before meeting them, and what did you do only after getting to know them more?

We haven't actually done much to prepare for our kids at home (physically), because we don't know if it's 1 or 2 coming home yet.  That changes the bedroom dynamics quite a bit.  We have some clothes-- in bins.  Nothing out because I don't know the kids' sizes.

Last adoption (international) I had everything ready before we left and then my family changed it all when things didn't happen how we expected.  

I'm curious what other people did well in advance and what things they waited to the 11th hour to do?

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Reply by Chris

11/8/2010 5:53:23 PM

1st adoption:
We had two beds set up that were TOTALLY full of clothes, toys, books, shoes.  They were overflowing they were so full.  We went way overboard.  It was like when we were expecting our first child.  When Micah and Matthew came home, we were also given a shower.  We didn't buy diapers for over 6 months.  We didn't buy clothes for 2 seasons.

2nd adoption:
We took 2 sets of pajamas with us.  That is the extent of the things we had.  When we were in Ukraine, we bought a coat, a couple of outfits and some diapers.  We just moved a boy out of a crib to a normal bed and put her in the evacuated crib.  That was it.  No shower, no overdoing the buying of clothes.  

3rd adoption:
2 weeks ago, it looked like we were not going to be able to make the 2010 deadline to get our papers in and the fear set in that our boy would be transferred before we could get to him.  To try and make those fears subside, we bought some clothes for our boy to make it more real.  It didn't work, but we do have the pjs and a few clothes.  Since he is so tiny and we don't know for sure what will fit him and how fast he will grow when we get him home, we won't buy too much in advance.  We have his bed in the garage and will get it set up as soon as we get some other things moved around at home.

Our next adoption:
We are bound to have everything we need already!  With this many kids, there something that will fit everyone but the oldest 2 in a box somewhere.  I'm sure of it!  :-)


Reply by Shelley

author of Only 1 Mom! 11/18/2010 2:38:54 PM

@Chris: LOVE that last comment about your next adoption!

For our first adoption, I bought some clothes before we traveled. They were on clearance and since someone had met our son 2 months before we traveled, I thought I had chosen a "safe" size. I was wrong! He wore them the NEXT year and we had to buy all new (much smaller) clothes, toys, diapers, bottles, etc (weren't prepared at all for "baby" needs).

We didn't do anything in advance for the next 2. Our first adoption, we were so shocked at how wrong we were about everything...his size, his level of needs, etc. that I guess I'm just "gun shy" now. With adoption number 2, we were given an updated height, weight and shoe size the week before we traveled, so we took 4 outfits with us. With the 3rd adoption, I took a tape measure on the first trip and bought a week's worth of clothes and shoes the week before I went on the 2nd trip (only a week's worth in case I was wrong on size). For this adoption, I'll do the same as the 3rd. 

Guess that puts us in the "prepare at the 11th hour" category :)


Reply by June

author of A Journey Of Growth 11/23/2010 6:54:54 AM

Adoption 1 was a domestic newborn, so I got all new baby clothes, crib etc. since I had gotten rid of everything after my two bio kids got older (since I was "done" having kids).  I had tons of everything.  Had everything set up in our bedroom.

 

Adoption 2 I got a crib (since I was also "done" after the last adoption and got rid of everything), from a friend, Was given, bought new on sale, and thrift store purchases for clothes.  My friends gave me a shower after we got home, what a blessing!  I bought tons of baby things since he was 3 mos when we started the adoption, he had outgrown almost all newborn things when we got him home at 22 mos.  Tons of toys!

 

Adoption 3 bought clothes at yard sales, new on clearance, thrift stores.  Bought bedroom stuff for a girl and painted everything white and pink (her favorite color).  Got games, toys I thought she would like, bought Baby Signing Time,  Did safety things for windows and doors since we didn't know if she would try to "escape" when no one was looking, lol.  We needn't have worried.  We had her room all set up, fit for a princess...which she is!

 

Due to health problems we don't think there will be any more adoptions.  It saddens me greatly, but God is in control and He will ultimately make the final decision.  If there are ever any more, I would do things more like the third, much more laid back.


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