I stayed home full time for almost two years, then went back part time. The month before he turned 3 I went back full time. We were doing alright until the economy hit my husband's job and the cuts began. First it was overtime being cut out, then it was insurance doubling, then it was the 401K match being cut out, then it was a 4% salary cut across the board. That was the final blow so I went back to teaching full time. I'm happy to be back in the classroom now, but I am so glad I got those three years to concentrate on figuring out this parenting stuff. I'm not just a natural at it!

Well, I left "working" I guess but I had never had a permanent job yet or career when I got pregnant. I had just turned 20 the month before finding out.  So, I guess it's more like I stayed home and didn't pursue work/career once I got pregnant.

I knew from day 1 that I would be home.  I'm just not the type to be able to trust someone day in and day out with my precious little one(s).  And I would miss so much!  

How has this affected us?  Well, my husband does work a lot to make sure we are able to pay everything we need to plus some extras.  But luckily he likes what he does and might even get a promotion soon (crossing our fingers!).  He has said before that he knows he couldn't do what I do so he is glad I can.  Because neither of us agree with leaving the kids with a sitter/relative/daycare on a regular everday/weekly basis. It's just not for us.  

Since I don't know what my life would have been like working (since I didn't really have a career when I became a mom), I don't know anything different to be able to compare it to and say it changed this or affected that. 

i'm doing the opposite.  i've been at home with kiddos for about 15 years now.  in 3 short months, i will be an official "career woman," and working mom.  

it's a balancing act, for sure...but, worth it on both sides.  i loved being home, and i'm loving starting a career.  even if i am starting one at 35!!

My daughter is about 3.5 and I chose to continue working. I am pregnant with my second now and will return to work after she is born too.

It is a tough decision for every family to make. My husband and I both grew up in homes that struggled financially the entire time we were growing up. Even though we both came from loving homes with doting parents, we both vividly recall what it was like and made a choice not to have that life. We cannot provide the life we want for our kids on just my husband's income so we both work. Plus I love what I do.

I do know I miss out on time with my daughter, but she is truly loved by the people she is with during the day and I love that she is in art, music, ballet, and being exposed to other languages. I know that if I were at home, we wouldn't be able to afford those opportunities and I am not equipped to teach all of that either. I am also a very social person and I believe having time like this outside of the home makes me a calmer, more patient, mom. I never lose my cool with my daughter or feel like I need a break. When I am with her, I am focused on her like a laser.

My career is going to enable my family to travel the world and allow my kids to try different activities and classes to their hearts desire. We don't worry about money or bills. We can afford the extras and don't stress out about how to buy new clothes or toys or meet any needs that arise. We have been able to financially help our families through difficult financial times and we are able to fully fund our retirement accounts, save for college, give to our church, and  save for other future items. True, there are sacrifices being made, but no one that is ever around my daughter would question that she is thoroughly loved, full of joy, and secure of her place in our lives. 

I will admit that I am lucky, because my husband is a 100% partner in our marriage and the raising of our daughter so it is never all on me. If I had to work full time and still do everything else all alone, I would go insane. 

I stayed at home, full time until about 4-5 years ago, I got a job teaching fitness classes.  This was a turning point for me.  I was only gone an hour a day (we homeschool, btw), but it improved my fitness level and my health tremendously.  

I also started teaching art & drama classes for our homeschool co-op.  It was good income, but horribly stressful.  This year I quit everything except the gym and EVERYTHING got so much better.  Then, I took 6 weeks off from the gym... and realized that I just want to stay home with my kids.  Everything is so much smoother with me just being at home.  Its more peaceful and schoolwork gets started and done earlier.

In my opinion, this is the kind of decision that is going to be different for everyone, and its an individual choice based on your family, your personality and your needs.

When my kids were born, I took a year mat leave with both, and went back to work full time afterwards.  When my son was 1 1/2, we moved to a remote community, where I was able to stay home with the kids.  Before staying home I was an optician/contact lens technician.  I still keep my license up to date in case I ever want to go back, however...

We have moved to the city now, and I am still home with my son while my daughter is in kindergarten.  I became an Arbonne independent consultant a year ago, and am able to supplement our income with this job.  I'm really lucky, as I can choose my own hours and work from home.  I can't see me going back into the "workforce" out of my home, as I'm doing too well at this, and love it too!

Plus, when the kids are in school, there are plenty of opportunities to help out in their classes and for field trips, so I'll be available to do all of that if I'm working from home!

I did enjoy going back to work after my mat leaves, and the kids did really well in daycare, but I also enjoy staying home with them - I don't think that either situation is better, just different.  IMO, it's important to socialize them early, and daycare or preschool is great for that! 

Thank you so much to all of you who are answering back. This is a HUGE issue I am struggling with. I left my career to be home with my kids. I love every minute of it, because I am ALWAYS available for my three boys.

However, money is tight, and I find myself frequently telling my boys "No, Mommy has no money for that".

It helps me a lot to hear what all of you are living presently. Everyone's life-family situation is unique, and we all have to make the best choice for our family.

Michelle  :)

I can understand that.  I usually answer with "not today".  It helps to tell them we have a list for the store and that today we aren't shopping for any "treats" (toys, candy, etc) and need to stick to the list.  They rarely ask. And now if they do ask for things they ask if they can get it for their birthday or for christmas even if its months away.  I keep a list and tell them I'll put it on the list for whichever is closest.  

That said, we also treat them to a surprise, no reason toy about 1-2 times a year.  Just recently we went to toys r us with my son while my daughter was at school.

Well, the baby got an elmo, my son picked out his first transformer, and I got my daughter a little pony she had asked for for her birthday but I could tell she really wanted.

When she saw it when she got home from school her face was priceless!  It felt awesome.

So, to me, if they constantly got new things it wouldn't be as fun for them! 

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Michelle said ...
However, money is tight, and I find myself frequently telling my boys "No, Mommy has no money for that".

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Thanks Anna :)

I have to say, I am very touched by all the honest answers all you mom's have been giving me.

I am brand new to the blog frog, and I have found that all you mom's on this network are supportive, and so "real" and honest.

It is a wonderful experience being part of this community.

Bless you all,

Michelle :)