Um, yeah, I can not remember ever having friends leave anywhere with anyone. 

I had two different groups of friends in college.  With one group, we watched out for one another and generally made sure everyone got home safely.

The other group--not so much. However, it did not matter what you did to this girl, she was going to do what she felt like doing despite anyone else's protest. Physically, I was no match for her and there was nothing I could do if she decided she was going home with some dude.

I'm with you. When I'm out with girl friends, we never leave anyone behind. That's always our rule.

I hate wrangling drunk girls. it stresses me out.

I had a "friend" who was a HORRIBLE alcoholic. she would get drunk and start trying to take home guys or hook up in the parking lot or bathroom. i had to stop hanging out with her at bars and clubs because she would just be a source of constant stress trying to wrangle her. but she didn't have to be drunk to hook up with guys, she pretty much would hook up with anyone. she was my first truly slutty friend.

i had another friend who would just disappear. we would be out at a restaurant, bar, club it didn't matter. we'd look up and she would be gone. She wouldn't answer her phone. nothing. The first time it happened i thought she had been abducted. everyone else knew better and was like, "no this is just what she does. never let her be the driver, or you'll have to take a cab home." so i didn't hang out with her after dark anymore.

my cousin and I would party together. she wouldn't go home with guys, but she would often drive home drunk and that would tear me up inside. all i could think of was that she was going to die and i would have to be the one to tell her mom that i couldn't stop her from drunk driving. . i would steal her keys and make her go eat at waffle house with me and try to sober her up. She's part of the reason I sobered my ass up and stopped partying so much. i had a mini intervention with her and she stopped as well. when we hang out now, it's just funny. she's a mommy and her husband is literally a rocket scientist. she goes to church every time the doors are open. but we just laugh quietly to ourselves and remember the shenanigans we used to get into.

That would stress me out too! I will say is a friend of mine had consistently acted like those examples, I wouldn't have been hanging out them them anymore either. Most of my stories are more of one time situations with different people on different occasions. I never tried to leave with anyone, but I am grateful I had friends that took control of my stupid self when I had too much to drink, rather than let me stay to close the bar down alone.

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dianne said ...
I hate wrangling drunk girls. it stresses me out.

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Thankfully, even when my friends got together and drank most of them stayed under the legal limit so they could get themselves home, and we usually did it at a friend's house so their was no issue. If you're at a good friend's house and they know you've had too much to drink your butt wasn't going home, and since (the ones that drank) all worked together there was never an issue of "I have to go home tonight I have to get to work tomorrow!"

My other friends didn't drink and we could all be horrible cock blockers when we went out together. If you went to the latin dance club, the men there did not take no, they didn't even ask if you wanted to dance, they would grab you and pull you to the dance floor. Us girls had to protect each other, if we went swing dancing it wasn't normally a problem. Most of those men were polite, didn't hit on you (at least not in a sleazy way) and if you did get the random person who would everyone there mostly knew each other. You just had to run back to one of your friends or one of the guys and there was no problem. I swear, one of my guy friends knew when I was being attacked by horrible leads and would save me with a good dance! lol

I have one friend who, even though we did not GO to the bar together, (we really only had ONE bar/club to patronize in our youth)  I was usually the one trying to keep her from taking off her clothes on the dance floor, and getting her home safely when we left.  She would sit with us... but random creepers would always end up around our table and she had a BAD habit of accepting more than one drink from them which in our day meant the guy would probably get the idea that she was going home with him....

It was NEVER fun and almost always ruined my night, but I can say that she never acted a COMPLETE fool or put herself into a compromising position on my watch.

:sigh: Tales of a misspent youth..  ;)  

I went through a stage where I was that drunk girl more often than I'd like to cop to.  I wasn't stupid enough to leave without a friend though and my friends were always good enough friends that they wouldn't have let me if I'd tried.  

There were a couple of times where I'd go home with a guy and I'd have a friend spending the night in his spare room or on the couch.  :S  

To even it out, I was the safety nazi with my friends too.  If they were vulnerable, I'd watch them like a hawk and would try to make sure that they wouldn't get up to anything they'd come to regret in the morning.  The one time I lost a friend at a party, she reappeared later to tell me that she'd done the nasty with some boy she'd just met in the bushes in the carpark outside.  And she admitted there was no protection involved.  Not a happy Jo.  I kinda hauled her into the bathroom and gave her the third degree before tracking down the guy and berating him in front of his friends.  I may have enquired about his sexual health and then demanded his phone number so that I could give him a call about child support in a few months time.  Kid was only 17-18 but hopefully it made him think twice about not using a hat next time he went to get his thing on with a chick who may or may not have insane friends..  ;) 

I'll take this one, seeing as I have admitted to bringing boys home from boys AND being left behind alone recently! ;)

For the record, I have only ever brought a guy home from a bar two times in my life. The first was years ago, and I was actually set up with him by a close mutual friend that night. We hit it off, had too much to drink, and he came home with me to sleep it off at my house. But I was pretty assured of the fact that he was a good guy because of the person who was setting us up, and anything that happened that night was 100% mutual! ;) We went on to date for about 2 months after that, and are still friends today.

The other time was last October or November. I had definitely had a lot to drink, and was trying to get over the boy. While out with friends, I ran into a guy I had met 3 years ago. We have a lot of mutual friends, and so again - I felt pretty safe with him. And the friends I was with again also knew him, so they would have had no reason to try to protect me from him. I took him home, and he was a complete gentleman when I laid down the ground rules about what would NOT be happening that night. We were both good and drunk, but we laughed and talked and hung out all night... never going anywhere below the waist! ;)

I've never attempted to go home with a guy other than those two instances. I really have a thing for sleeping in my own bed when drunk, and will happily pay for a cab if that's what needs to happen so that I find my way home. So my friends have never really had to worry about me going home with someone else.

BUT, I do have this weird habit of having a few drinks and deciding I want to stay hanging out long past when my friends are ready to leave. I would say this happens about twice a year (pretty much the amount of times I get really drunk a year). I am an incredibly happy, loving drunk and I'm pretty sure I typically seem more sober than I am. So when I'm telling my friends I'm fine and want to stay, I don't blame them at all for believing me. Part of it is that I am rarely out anywhere where I don't know a ton of people. If I'm out at a bar here, in all likelihood I'm going to run into at least 10 other people I know besides the group of friends I'm with. The same was always true with the bars we went to in San Diego too. So I was never "really" alone. And at 28 years old, I don't for one second expect my friends to be my keepers. I am pretty damn good at taking care of myself, even drunk. It's pretty rare I need a babysitter, and my friends are pretty good at assessing the situation before deciding whether or not to leave me. And if anything ever DID happen to me... that would be 100% on me. Not them.

I do think it's a woman's responsibility to protect herself and keep from getting so drunk that she increases the likelihood to be a victim. But I don't necessarily think that responsibility falls on her friends. And I don't think every situation is black and white.

That said, after New Years I did actually tell my roommate that if and when the situation ever arises again, she should just make me go with her. Like I said, I'm a pretty happy drunk and I highly doubt I would put up much of a fight. I don't think I'm her (or anyone else’s) responsibility, but I realize that no part of me NEEDS to be out partying until 3 in the morning anymore. After a few drinks, I become convinced I can still hang. But really... it's cool if someone just gets me home and safe to my bed instead!

 Says the girl who goes to a bar by herself and then gets in a car with a total stranger to go to his house without giving anyone she knows the heads up as to where she's going! ;)

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Muliebrity said ...
Um, yeah, I can not remember ever having friends leave anywhere with anyone. 

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