I honestly believe that is a situation one has to live to be able to say one way or another.  If it ever happened to me...no, I wouldn't  leave.  I love my hub too much & I know, in our case, that it would be a massive mental breakdown that caused it.

If we are not in it, it's extremely difficult to say that we'd be out the door & mean it.  Whether or not we believe that it's wrong...oh, you know the old saying, walk a mile in someone else's shoes.  You can't possibly know until you're there.  Those that say you would, kudos to you & your strength, but having been with my hub for nearly 20 years, I don't think I'd have it in me to drop everything & go.

I know a woman who had the appearance of strength & control & found out years into the friendship that she was being abused.  No outward signs, no indication whatsoever.  You just never know.

Before I was married I told my husband that if he ever laid a hand on me he would be out the door the same day ! 

(it came up in a conversation while watching a film on the subject)... He has yet to try :)

I know how my mother was mentally hurt because her father beat her mother ...I believe that certain problems she had later in life was caused by her having to witness violence at home .

If not for yourself do it for the kids !!!

No one deserves to be hit...period. AND...only part of Ephesians 5 was quoted above. Read all of the verses, 22-33. You're leaving out a very important part of the passage:

Verses 25-30: Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her (the church) to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands out to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church - for we are members of his body.

If a man loves his wife as Christ loved the church, he wouldn't beat her.

There are no easy answers to a problem like this, but I agree that if a man hits once, he'll hit again. I have been married for almost 32 years, but if my husband hit me I would leave immediately...immediately!

Praying for your friend.

I was in a far more "fortunate" situation when I faced abuse. I had no kids, nothing that in my mind tied me to that man more than the vows we'd made. 

We had always had a physical relationship, lots of wrestling, horsing around, etc., but I'd never been struck at in the way I was that day. And it was just that once. I walked out.

He got counseling, did all the right things, but I couldn't go back. We've each (happily) remarried, and I wish him all the best, but I couldn't stay.

That being said, I truly believe that there are times when the assault is... for lack of a better term, a fluke. The shock I saw on his face when he realized he had struck at me in anger, and the efforts he made to see both a man of God and a therapist, told me he was serious about healing whatever had broken inside him that day. For me, however, the risk wasn't worth it. Had we had children, it might have been different, but I doubt it. 

Praying for your friend, and for you. It's a hard path to travel, and I don't think there are ever black and white answers.

For me...if he hit me...the first thing I would do would be to hit back. Then call my dad and have my dad beat him up. Then kick him out and keep the house.

But, my hubby would never in a million years do that...not only is he gentle and kind but scared of both me and my dad.

But seriously...I had a girlfriend of mine (whom I'd also known since we were kids). We found out after a long time of it going on that her then boyfriend was beating her up really bad (throwing her down stairs, punching in the face, trying to choke her). Chris and I always let her come over - we always called the police but it would be just a matter of a few days that he'd call and say he was SO SORRY and that he'd NEVER DO IT AGAIN and that if she JUST DIDN"T MAKE HIM MADE...HE WOULDN"T HAVE TO HIT HER.

Have to??

She put up with this for about 3 years, and lost a baby because he threw her down the stairs. Only to get pregnant again about 4 months later by him and she finally smartened up.

It's a matter of self esteem, I think. If a woman values herself then she would never let a man beat her like that.

JMO!

Sam

Mom.Undecided.

I would leave the same night and press charges against him as well. I have no tolerance what so ever for domestic violence.

i watched an Aunt of mine nearly get killed by a Man who did this to her. It was always "just one" hit, then it progressed.

Simply put,- no questions asked- I would be GONE

Been there. Done that.  The person who I not so affectionately refer to as 'sperm donor' was abusive.  We had bought a house together, had been dating for a few years, but weren't married.  I was young though and a very naive.  It took me getting pregnant with my son to get up the courage to tell somebody.  That somebody was my boss at the time who was also a good friend, he forced me to go to the police with a co-worker and get a restraining order.  If I hadn't been pregnant though, would I have spoken out?  I don't know.  I think at the time I thought more of the safety of my son, than my own safety.

I would like to say though that he grew up in a house where his father hit his mother, not that I am defending him in any way, but it still leaves me thinking ....

It's definitely not right for a man to hit a woman under any circumstance. There is no way to justify it. 

My sister was routinely being punched violently by her husband and she told no one. It finally stopped when the police happened to pull up behind them in traffic! Their marriage finally ended in divorce.

Some times when certain violent-natured men have a short emotional trigger, and no self control, they can be provoked by nagging or ridicule. Even so, it still isn't justifiable. Nagging or provoking them with insults is like throwing gasoline on a fire.

I'm not saying your friend did that, I'm only commenting on what is a common root cause. Sometimes there is no way to resolve this problem. Take drastic measures to keep things from growing worse.