I've always struggled with self-esteem.  Since I was little.  And then I married into a pornography addiction and it did NOTHING to help it!  I wish I had advice...but truth be told I struggle with it everyday.  I'm trying to figure this whole blogging thing out in the hopes that I can find healing and eventually learn how to see myself as God sees me.

http://liesthatbreakus.blogspot.com/

Hi Bailey :)

You know, blogging is often a very cathartic activity.  You share feelings and thoughts that you aren't comfortable sharing with people closer to you and get feedback from others who don't have a lot of emotional baggage about you.

I know that blogging has been an esteem boost for me!

I've always had problems with self esteem. I used to be a bully victim, which probably started it.. and I've been struggling all my life. It's become much better for some reason after some travelling, and after I took my nursing degree and got a somewhat organized life. I've had the courage to start new things and do things like learning to play musical instruments and even play and sing in public, and learn some other new things. But I always get my moments or periods of time when I'm worse with it.. blogging definitely helps, and I also hang a lot on forums and such, and make new friends. That also helps.

Advice.... I don't know. I guess my advice would be to start doing something you really love, and get really good at it. Then you know that you're good at something. But also, self esteem is so much more than being good at DOING things. It's about who you are. But I actually think it helps knowing I'm good at something. It sort of covers up for everything else.

Being bullied in school is a rough start for sure.  I've been on both sides on that sadly.  I was targeted fora while and I figured out if I bullied someone else I could get the focus off of me... I'm so ashamed of that.

Do you ever really forget the cruel things people said to you in school?  Probably not... but we can forgive them for the way they made us feel and remove that emotional weight.

Honestly there was a time that I did struggle with the self esteem issue, but that is when I started praying to God A LOT.. A few prayers later I realized that it was helping me and I haven't stopped since

I don't think I'll ever forget what the bullies said and how they made me feel.. but I've come forgiven them and moved on. The scars are there and they remind me now and then of the past.. but it doesn't affect my life so much anymore. But it takes time, faith, and strength... and requires that you have friends and people around you who can sort of prove that the bullies were wrong. I always struggle with feeling good enough though. That's my greatest struggle in life, I think.

The most important thing is to first understand who you are and second to begin to love yourself. It is difficult for others to understand you and love you if you don't. There is a website www.gospellight.com that can really help you understand your birth personality. That is who you are from birth,not who you have become because of being bullied or whatever the situation maybe. Sometimes because of different events in our lives we have taken on a personality that helps us to adjust to life,but,that is not necessarily who we were meant to be.

Go to the website and check out the well of information that is available to you and begin to really live the life that God intended for you and become the best you can be.

Hi Kelly,

Great topic of discussion.  I think that in today's world it is so easy to lose sight of what the Bible has to offer for our everyday living.  Self esteem, for example is really not supported by the Bible.  Did you know that?  Actually, the Bible has something to say about just the opposite ... the esteem of others.  Take a look:

(Phil 2:2-4)  Fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.

Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.

Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.

Of course I have only shared one passage here, if you search the Scriptures you will find the theme of "esteeming others" throughout.

So what about self esteem?  Well, when we look to the things of others we are too busy to be thinking about ourselves. My advice is to focus on serving others and you will know the true joy ... the lasting joy that comes with that.

Visit my site to see how Christianity is for everyday living

Like all of you a had very low self esteem due to the fact that I'm coming from a very abusive family, one day I came across this people who are experts in improving women self esteem and I got it tell you all I feel much better!

I'm struggling hard right now with it, not that I didn't before (I also came from a very abusive family).  My very long term marriage just ended, my very recent ex just moved a woman into my home (we'll be trying to sell it soon), the very woman he had an affair with years ago, and I'm finding MAJOR lies and deceptions he's been pulling for years.  It seems like everything I thought was the truth, wasn't.  I'm fighting feeling very stupid and naive for not seeing.  Sorry, this is all so raw right now.  No questions here, except I keep reminding myself how the Lord feels about me.